When a body dies…

…this is what I believe

I don’t need validating, but if anyone did, I hope that this helped.

When someone dies, does it actually feel like they have gone? Like gone gone? Do you call them, talk to them?

I always did, it wasn’t even a thing. Morning mum. It felt natural.

The night after my mum had died, I remember falling asleep sobbing. I was at home in my childhood bed, I felt her softly kiss me on the cheek.

First it was her presence, as she had done hundreds of time before. Coming into the room from the doorway - her energy, I could feel the warmth, safeness - I felt connected to her again. My body was reacting too, the biggest reassurance and contentment, the overwhelming feeling of love, of something I do not know the words for, I felt that. I was not alone. After she kissed me, tears down my face. Tears of beautiful hope and spiritual loveliness.

My dad was different. I didn’t really feel him for a while. But I’d get radio messages. The song I sent him. Playing whilst I was crying coming home from work. I get lots of radio song messages. I will start journaling them.

But one day, driving home I felt him sat in the middle of the back seat. “Why you sat in the back dad?”. Warmth - like a huge energy hug, I felt like I was being cocooned and softly squeezed with love.

I talk to both parents all the time. They come to me*, when I need them or when I just want I need reminding about his beautiful life is, and how lucky I am.

* how they come to me;

-I just feel them

-robins

-trees waving (sometime all still apart from one crazy one)

-radio songs

-random items showing up or getting hid

-plus more